CNN invented before internet? WTF?

Even as CNN apologizes for Novak's invocation of "bullshit," I want an apology for a CNN commercial I saw last night.

To paraphrase their idiotic 25-year-history promo, "Before the internet, there was CNN." Okay, Shaved Apes, listen to truth. The internet was switched on by the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA) in September, 1969.

CNN slipped out of the jackal's pussy in 1980.

Where's the Deliverance theme song when I need it?

CNN should be more honest in its self-promoting scheisse. Like this, perhaps: "Before cute, colorful operating systems and browsers were invented to give feces-brained dumbasses access to an already mature information sharing network, there was CNN."

Do any Shaved Apes understand that HTML-based "web" pages lie on top of a pre-existing electronic computer network called the internet? Damn it, people, we go through this again and again (see Dumbass Al Gore). I was born in September 1969; not even my old bones predate the flippin internet. Why can't Shaved Apes grasp this? Maybe after another 250 million years of evolution some of you will bother to look past your swinging dicks and see the world.

It's not that surprising to see CNN and Al Gore blatantly lie to make themselves look good and/or be so stupid as to not know anything about the most important communications/information tool in the history of the planet. (For instance, you wouldn't be reading this blog, heh heh)

CNN should just hire Algore. It would be a fetid union resulting in a dishonest, intellectually challenged, stuttering monologue about invisible, bloodthirty monsters (like cigarette smoke) creeping into houses and attacking families while they sleep as peacefully as babies listening to lullabies sung by angels from heaven. I'd even watch that.